THE GREAT PRETENDER Read online

  Nodding, Renee slumped backward in the loveseat.

  Reginald’s eyes now glistened with tears of his own as he continued. “Tracy and I haven’t gotten along for years. To make a long story short, many years ago, she had an affair with a man she worked with, and I found out about it. My first instinct was to file for a divorce, but then my sister, Thelma, got me thinking about the impact on my kids and reminiscing about how we grew up with no father, what his absence meant to our lives. I didn’t want that for Olivia and Valerie, so I agreed that Tracy and I could continue raising them together, until they were of age.

  “Now that Valerie’s almost eighteen, my freedom seemed to be approaching…But then this happened. Once the girls were grown up and the divorce was final, I planned to ask you to marry me. I was planning to move to Orlando permanently. I don’t know how I was gonna tell you about my children. I honestly hadn’t thought that far into the future. I just planned to play the cards as they were dealt and take it from there.

  “And quite frankly, to be absolutely honest, I never planned to tell you that I had been married all these years. I hoped I would never have to confess that, not only because it would be hard for me, but also because I could only imagine how much it would hurt you.” He paused and glanced at her, assessing the damage. She had remained silent, but the crying hadn’t stopped.

  Wiping his own face dry, Reggie took a deep breath. When he spoke again, his words were choked. “Renee, I couldn’t blame you for hating me now—no one could. You made a home here with a man you trusted, and now it’s broken.” Then, with passion, he added, “I am so very sorry.” He paused, letting the words penetrate the disturbed air; like a soothing balm.

  “Please understand,” he whispered. “I never wanted to hurt you and Denise. That’s why I kept my marriage a secret all these years. I should have told you I was married from the very start, but I did not.” He held her gaze. “I cared about you so much that I risked everything to buy this house and stay here with you. Lord, if Tracy ever found out, she could take me to the cleaners when we get the divorce.”

  They sat in another lengthy silence. Finally, he went on. “Now I have to spend every possible moment at Valerie’s side. So I had no choice but to tell you the truth. I won’t rest until they find a match for her. Until then, Tracy and I will continue making things seem as whole as possible, so there’s nothing to distract her from fighting this thing. Her oncologist says the mind can be a powerful healer…” He turned his head, appearing too choked up to speak any further.

  Renee had begun hugging a fluffy throw pillow. She clutched it and squeezed her eyes shut. He was married? Actually already married?

  He had a wife. Two kids. Girls. One was twenty-one and the other was seventeen and recently diagnosed with leukemia…Reginald is married. Her Reggie was married to another woman. With two daughters. All these years he’d been married...going to Miami to a wife and two kids for half the month. He’d been sleeping with—“Do you have sex with her?” she asked suddenly.

  After a brief stillness, Reginald rose from the armchair and knelt in front of her. He took her trembling hands, and rooted her to the loveseat, looking deeply into her eyes. “Tracy and I haven’t shared the same bed since the day I discovered she was sleeping with somebody else. Look at me, Renee—say you believe that.” His eyes commanded a reply. “Say it.”

  She raised her wet lids, searching his face for any sign of dishonesty, but she found none. “I believe you,” she murmured.

  He kissed her hands. “I’m sorry. I know that you may never be able to forgive me, but please believe that I never wanted to hurt you or the baby. I wish to God that I didn’t have to do this now. I hate hurting you like this, but I know this is the time to do the right thing.”

  Exhaling deeply, he rose and went toward the staircase. “I’ll go pack a few things and get going. I don’t want to make this any more difficult for you than it has to be.” After a beat, he added, “You do know that I love you, Renee…I have always loved you.” Then he jogged up the stairs to pack up and walk out of her life.

  •

  I can’t let him go! thought Renee in anguish. I can’t lose him.

  But I could wait. That’s it! I’ll wait. She could wait for his daughter’s recovery, and when he finally got divorced, he’d marry her!

  I could forgive him being married. He didn’t sleep with his wife; I’ve been the only one.

  It certainly could not have been easy for him to tell her all this now, but his daughter’s life was in danger and, of course, that had to come first. Renee understood. This news, in and of itself, proved that Reginald Brooks had a conscience; he was a decent man. No…she could not let him go. She would not let him leave. I’d be crazy if I let him walk out that door.

  At that moment, Renee leapt from the sofa and ran up the stairs, drying her nose and face in her sleeve.

  When she reached their bedroom, Reggie was taking a handful of silk ties from his marble bureau. Walking over to him, she said, “I can forgive you. Don’t leave. Don’t go anywhere. I forgive you.” Cupping his face, she perched on tiptoes and kissed him.

  “I can’t believe this,” whispered Reginald. He brought his arms around her waist and held her close. Her body wracked with sobs. In that moment, he couldn’t hold back tears of his own. He’d succeeded.

  He felt awful.

  When they broke apart, he searched her eyes. “Are you sure? I mean, have you had enough time to think this through? You—you really forgive me?”

  Renee smiled up at him. “Reggie, I love you and I know I can trust you.” She paused, then added, “You proved it tonight when you told me all this. I know this must’ve been one of the hardest things in the world for you to do. I think most men would’ve made up another lie or another game, anything to avoid telling the truth, but you told me the truth…And you were willing to leave me with my dignity. Most men would’ve kept me in the dark.

  “I’ll wait for you, Reggie—as long as it takes. Right now, obviously your daughter’s health is the most important thing. Go be with her. You have my blessing. Denise and I will be here for you whenever you need us. We’ll be waiting for you to come back home.” She stretched her arms around his waist, holding tight. “We’ll wait for you forever. I love you, Reggie. How could I hate you for telling me the truth? I could never hate you.”

  Reginald was relieved, but it was offset by a deep sense of guilt. This had played out far better than he anticipated. He never dreamed she’d come around so quickly. Without a doubt, Renee loved him. Tonight certainly proved it, and now more than ever, he needed to protect that love and ensure it never turned bitter.

  Because his heart was with Tracy. These years with Renee had revealed that nothing could ever change that—not even Renee and Denise.

  In light of tonight’s progress, Reginald was confident he would not have problems spending time with Denise in the future…Which brought another potential problem to mind. And he decided to settle it now. Putting some space between them, he said, “Would you agree that Denise never has to know about this? I mean, I don’t think it’s something she needs to find out.”

  “No, I won’t tell her anything. Once your daughter gets well and we get married, Denise won’t even know anything was wrong.” Leaving his arms, Renee walked over to the large window that overlooked the grounds. “What about your kids? How will they handle you moving away from Miami?”

  “Well, they’re big girls now. They’ll learn to accept it. I’m sure they won’t warm to it much at first, but they’ll eventually adjust. Besides,” he said, moving up behind her, “they do have their mother. Even when they find out about Denise, I’m sure with a little time, they’ll love her like I do. She is their sister, after all. Tracy won’t be too happy about it, though. She’ll be kicking herself for not finding out before the divorce.”

  Renee continued gazing out across the moonlit lawn. Reginald was cuddling her from behind, burying his face in the crook of her neck.r />
  Married, she thought. As he stands here holding me, he’s a married man. Married to a woman named Tracy. The man she had been living with for six years! Dear God, would she ever really be able to digest it?

  Turning her tear-soaked face into his chest, she whispered, “Reassure me, babe. Reassure me that you’ll be back and we’re going to get married.”

  Reggie lifted her off her feet. He carried her to the waterbed and gently laid her down. Her eyes were still filled with tears. Slowly, he used his tongue to dry them as they fell. He began whispering words of love, of comfort, and most importantly, of reassurance. He promised her a future filled with happiness, though he knew it would never be with him.

  He made love to her most of the night. Reassuring her. Comforting her. Begging her for forgiveness that she swore was already his.

  All the while, his soul was elsewhere. Miles and miles away in a city called Miami where Tracy was waiting for him to come home. He couldn’t wait to get back home to her. It was a long time coming, but he was finally going to do right by her. Him, Tracy, and their girls, finally a normal family. It’s what they needed after all these years of chaos.

  Reginald filled Renee with silent apologies as he stroked her for the last time, just before dawn.

  •

  Saturday morning, Reginald awoke to find Renee’s side of the bed empty. After listening for a moment and hearing no movement from the bathroom, he panicked.

  Perhaps things had gone a little too well last night. Perhaps she awoke and realized she didn’t want to sweep six years of lies under the rug so quickly after all. What if she decided to take Denise and run away? What if…

  Before his mind could wander any further, their bedroom door opened and Renee strolled in carrying a breakfast tray. She was clad in a white terrycloth robe and wore a glowing smile that stretched from ear to ear. Relax, he thought. Clay.

  “Good Morning,” he said, eyeing her sexily.

  “Good Morning. I made breakfast.” She placed the tray over his lap and extended the retractable sides. “I called the McDuffies, Denise is fine. Then I labored over ham and cheese omelets, full of everything you like: green onions, bacon, tomato, and bell peppers. And I even toasted bagels and covered them with cream cheese…Just the way you like it.”

  “You didn’t have to, Renee,” he said quietly. He covered her hand with his. “Despite what you’ve said, I know it’ll take some time for you to get used to what’s happened.”

  “Listen, I really do understand. And as I said, I’ll wait for you. As long as it takes.” She kissed him lightly on the lips. “I love you too much to do anything else.”

  As Reggie took the first bite of the delicious omelet and sipped his orange juice, he allowed himself to breathe for the first time in nearly twenty-four hours.

  All was well again in Orlando.

  •

  Helen Jameson squeezed Crest onto her toothbrush and began brushing her teeth. This Saturday morning found her in the same mood she’d been trapped in for the last two days. The altercation with her younger sister had upset her terribly, leaving a bad mood she couldn’t seem to shake.

  Once her teeth were clean, Helen gargled with Listerine until her mouth was on fire. Satisfied with her oral hygiene for the morning, she decided to talk to her mother about the situation. It was safe to assume that Renee had not yet beaten her to it, because knowing her mother as she did, she would have long since called Helen to discuss every detail. Beatrice loathed when any of her three children quarreled. Even in their adulthood, she continued being a dedicated mediator, looking out for the well being of the Jameson clan.

  After making Cream of Wheat for Ashley and Brian, Helen settled back into bed with a bowl of her own. She reached for the remote control and decided on the Cartoon Network’s Saturday morning lineup. Lowering the volume, she reached for the bedside telephone and dialed her parents’ number.

  Bea answered on the second ring. “Hello?” she said, voice singing.

  “Good morning, Mom! Long time no talk.”

  “Good morning, honey. I know, I know. Ben and I were planning to stop by last evening for dinner, since you’re the only person we know who cooks on Fridays, but Dean and Pat invited us over for a game of cribbage, and we didn’t leave until almost midnight! I’m surprised I’m awake this early...”

  The last thing Helen wanted to hear was her mother ramble about the cribbage game, so she cut to the chase. “Mom, I need to talk to you. Renee and I had it out on Wednesday evening, and it’s killing me.”

  For the next few minutes, Helen abridged the details of the spat. She purposely omitted the portion where she had called her niece a bastard, since she was certain her mother would only spend the remainder of the conversation harping on it.

  “Oh, Helen! Why did you have to say anything at all to her?” Bea demanded. “You couldn’t wait to tell her you knew, could you?” Helen could picture her mother wagging her index finger in midair.

  “Oh, forget that. I can’t take this silence. I mean, we both said some mean things, and I just feel awful about the whole thing. I feel even worse because I have a gut feeling that she’s pushing us away so she can reach for something that really isn’t even there. You know what I mean?”

  “I know what you mean…But don’t you think she has a point where Lonny is concerned? You really should talk to him, Helen. Ashley is a fragile child. You can’t keep letting him disappoint her like this. She’ll probably grow up hating men or something.”

  “I know. I just don’t want to deal with Lonny any more than is necessary…But I will have a talk with him about it. If it happens again, I just won’t make arrangements with him to come pick her up anymore—simple as that.”

  “I think that’d probably be for the best. I agree with Renee—that little girl spends too much time feeling sad, and she’s too young for that!” Bea paused. “I also agree with you about Renee and Reginald. The man is trouble. Big trouble. You can see it a mile away.”

  “What can we do?”

  “Honey, we can’t do anything,” said Bea in a concerned tone. “All we can do is butt out and let her make her own mistake. I just hope I can stand it when she’s hit with reality. You know how Renee is.”

  “Well, in the meantime, I’m gonna call her and try to fix this mess, and I’m prepared for an uphill battle. I know how stubborn she can be…but we already miss her, Mom—and Denise, too. Ashley kept asking about her this morning.”

  “That’s right, you call her. You know she won’t be the one to take the first step.”

  “Yeah…and I’m sure it’ll be all right. We’ll work it out.” Finishing off the last of her porridge, Helen attempted to get the conversation on a lighter note. “So, did Daddy finally get his fishing rods from Dean?”

  •

  Renee looked through the peephole. Helen was on the other side of the door. What the hell is she doing here? she thought. I don’t need this right now.

  Breathing a sigh, she opened the door, but offered no greeting.

  When it became apparent that Renee would sooner have her bake under the rays of the sun than invite her to come inside, Helen cautiously brushed past her and stepped into the tiled entryway. She glanced around briefly, looking for Reginald. She’d seen his silver Land Cruiser shining out front and knew he was home.

  Moving over to the loveseat, Helen sat, crossed her long legs and smoothed her pleated skirt. She put her purse on the coffee table, and she waited.

  Closing the door, Renee followed her sister into the living room, but did not take a seat. Instead, she leaned against the column of the archway, folded her arms, and remained silent. She just stared at Helen. She prayed to high heaven that her sister hadn’t come over to cause trouble, especially in light of what had happened the night before.

  “I’m sorry,” said Helen after a brief pause. “I miss you and Denise, and I’m sorry,” she said quietly.

  If the wall had suddenly turned into a cobra and bit her on the
butt, Renee couldn’t have been more surprised. Taken aback, her arms fell and hung at her sides. An apology was the last thing she’d expected from Helen.

  Overwhelmed, the hostility left her.

  “I’m sorry, too,” Renee murmured, her eyes filling. She didn’t want to start crying before Reginald left. He’d suspect that she’d immediately run to her sister with the news. So she rushed over to the couch and desperately put her arms around Helen.

  Equally surprised by Renee’s reaction, Helen returned the hug, but she said, “Something else is wrong. Something other than our quarrel. What is it?”

  They pulled apart just as Reginald descended the stairs. He was dressed in business-casual beige khakis and a polo shirt that Renee had just ironed. Perfectly groomed, he was striking. He brought the captivating fragrance of Escada down the stairs, and both women flushed at the sight of him.

  Renee gazed up at him, remembering how sweetly he’d made love to her the night before, and how he’d felt inside her. She noticed that Helen shifted her eyes toward the bright, sunny sky on the other side of the living room window.

  Renee had always been aware of her sister’s attraction to Reginald. Whether she was conscious of it or not, his presence made Helen visibly tense. She, like most women Renee knew, found him to be distractingly attractive and damn near irresistible. The man was gorgeous, and Helen had always been attracted.

  “Hello, Helen,” greeted Reginald, as he snapped his watch into place.

  “Hello, Reggie,” said Helen, fixing her gaze on the little girl riding her tricycle across the street. “How have you been?”

  “I’ve been well, thanks.” He went to the closet for his briefcase. “I’m heading to the office for a few hours to tie up some loose ends...I’ll be away a little longer than usual. I’m sure Renee will fill you in.” He glanced up. “By the way, how are the kids doing?”